February 07, 2007

Steve: Ow. Damn. Ow. You guys. Man, what's the matter with you? I just had this pressed.

Kayla: Thank you.

Steve: Oh, pad, sweet pad. All the comforts of home...if you live under the freeway.

Kayla: You really don't need to joke to keep my spirits up.

Steve: I think the laughs are for me, baby. I'm just trying to take the sting out of that handling the judge gave me at the arraignment.

Kayla: Yeah, he did kind of read you the riot act, didn't he?

Steve: Kind of. Assault and battery, resisting arrest, and my personal favorite -- terrorist threats. That's me -- Osama bin Johnson.

Kayla: Nobody believes that.

Steve: Listen, baby, all I want to do is get this bail processed, get home, and forget this craziness ever happened.

Kayla: But we're not going home, remember? You promised that you would check yourself in to the psyche ward at university hospital. And I'm holding you to that.

Steve: Okay, here's the deal -- as soon as they cut me loose, we go home, I make love to my beautiful wife, and then you can take me over to the hospital -- cuckoo's nest. I'll flutter around with the rest of the cuckoo birds.

Kayla: You are a nut.

Steve: That's not very PC of you, baby. I'm challenged.

Kayla: You really are taking this very well.

Steve: I'm not. I'm boot-shaking scared.

Dr. Beale: Kayla?

Kayla: Oh, Dr. Beale. So good to see you. How are you? This is my husband, Steve Johnson. Steve, this is the doctor from the hospital.

Steve: Hi, doctor.

Dr. Beale: Hello, Steve.

Kayla: Dr. Beale's been a colleague of mine for several years. He's the chief of the psychiatric unit at university hospital, and he is here to oversee your transfer.

Dr. Beale: I have your papers right here for you to sign. It's standard procedure.

Steve: "Name," "height," "psychosis." I'm sorry, doctor. It ain't gonna work for me.

Kayla: You promised.

Steve: I know, baby, but I'm not crazy.

Dr. Beale: Nobody said you were.

Steve: Listen, man, I got this thing inside my head. I know I can fix it on my own if I can just find the key.

Kayla: I know that you hate that you can't solve this on your own.

Steve: No, I can't, but we can do it together, baby. Why don't we take some time alone, go away again?

Kayla: I cannot stop the rage that's inside of you or your life spinning out of control, and neither can you. Listen, I know seeking help is scary, but it's also the bravest thing that you can do. Please, work with Dr. Beale. Let him help you get your life back.

Steve: Okay. Answer me this, doctor. How long would I be on the inside?

Dr. Beale: You'd be committing yourself for a period of evaluation and diagnosis for two weeks -- not long, really.

Steve: Oh, no, not long when you're trapped like a rat in a padded cell.

Kayla: You make it sound like it's a life sentence. Really, the time will go quickly.

Steve: That's easy for you to say.

Kayla: But what if the doctors could actually cure you? What if this dread and anger you carry around could go away?

Steve: I'm not a head case!

Dr. Beale: Steve, the judge granted bail contingent on your submitting to this psychiatric evaluation. Now, if I have to report that you've changed your mind, your bail could be revoked and you'd be forced to stay here pending trial, which could take months to get on the docket.

Steve: Okay. I get it. You're not giving me a choice. It's either jail or the psycho circus. Both of those are a straitjacket to me. I'm not doing it. No. Nobody tells me where to go or what to do -- no shrinks, no judge -- nobody.

Steve: I'm not signing that -- no way, no how.

Kayla: So, you'd just rather stay in jail.

Steve: Two weeks here, two weeks there -- what the hell difference does it make?

Dr. Beale: Why don't I leave this with you?

Steve: Why don't you not?

Kayla: Here. I'll take it. Thank you.

Dr. Beale: I'll grab myself a coffee and leave you two to discuss things.

Kayla: Thank you, doctor.

Steve: I'm sorry, baby. Listen, I don't want to give you a hard time.

Kayla: Well, it's not any harder than you're being on yourself.

Steve: Just, two weeks in a mental ward? Come on, that's about 14 days too long. I just don't think I could cut it.

Kayla: Do you remember when we were in that quarantine together? Remember, you didn't remember anything about our life together or how much we loved each other. You rallied. You got well. You were free to leave, but you didn't. You stuck by my side, even though it was risking your life. And look at Shawn, Belle, and Claire. You risked your life for them, too. They would have never gotten out of this country if it wasn't for you.

Steve: Yeah. See? Does that sound like a crazy man to you?

Kayla: No, it sounds like the man I love who has a problem he cannot solve. Look, you are always willing to go out on the next big adventure, to go to the ends of the earth for anybody who asks you to do that. All I am saying is go that same distance for yourself now. Please.

Steve: Look, I'm not stupid. I know I got serious legal problems if I don't sign that thing.

Kayla: I think that legal problems might be the least of your worries. If the Dimeras do have a vendetta against you and if what Benjy said is true --

Steve: I believe it was.

Kayla: Then your life could be in great danger.

Steve: Listen, if wells wanted to get at me, you don't think he could do it in some psyche ward?

Kayla: I already called ahead, and you'll have complete security.

Steve: But not from this. Kayla, until I find out what's going on in here, no shrink, no hypnosis, nobody is gonna make that go away.

Kayla: What are you gonna do, then, just stay in here and live with it?

Steve: At least in here I won't hurt anybody.

Kayla: That is what you're afraid of, isn't it -- that you might hurt me?

Steve: You're right. I don't want to hurt anybody, especially not you.

Kayla: But you don't know if you can control it.

Steve: I don't even know what happens to me when these things come over me. Like this last time, one minute I'm standing there talking to wells, the next minute I'm on the ground covered in glass with a set of handcuffs on me.

Kayla: Which is all the more reason to find out what's causing this.

Steve: Baby, but a psyche ward --

Kayla: I don't want to argue with you anymore. You say you love me, that you would do anything for me. Prove it.

Steve: You don't fight fair, do you?

Kayla: I don't want to fight. I just want my husband back.

Steve: You want me to prove I love you.

Kayla: Just sign on the dotted line.

Steve: After you come in here and make love to me.

Kayla: Sign the papers first, and then we'll see if you get lucky.

Steve: Come here. Give me that. Hope you still think I'm sexy in a straitjacket with drool on it.

Kayla: What woman wouldn't? It's gonna be all right. I promise you. And we're gonna get our life back. I'm gonna take this in.

Steve: I don't know, baby. I just don't know.